Current mood:

crazy

words to ponder


1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks'trus) adj.
Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub tap on
and off with your toes.

2. CARPERPETUATION (kar'pur pet u a shun) n.
The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string
or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching
over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it
back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the
piece of confection (lollipop or gum) you dropped
on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will
somehow "remove" all the germs.

4. ELBONICS (el bon'iks) n. The actions of two
people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie
theater.

5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that
refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps
backing a person across the room, until he finally
decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay'
shun) n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a
milk container so badly that one has to resort to
the "illegal" side.

7. PEPPIER (peph ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy
restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be
walking around, asking diners if they want fresh
ground pepper.

8. PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of
dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you
are calling just as he or she answers.

9. PUPKUS (pup'kus) n. The moist residue left on
a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun)
n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least
twice before you pick it up, even when you're only
six inches away.

11. ORCHIDOPODY (or ki do po dy') act of hitting
a man in the testis